If you are regularly overeating, or impulsively eating, you need to listen to this podcast.
There is a direct link between overeating, emotions and not satisfied needs.
Believe it or not family history plays a role as well.
Listen to find out!
Listen to the show
You will learn
- What are the impulses that make us overeat
- Emotional causes of binge-eating
- Subconscious psychological causes of binge-eating
Hello dear friend, in this episode, we will talk about the causes for binge eating, and other complications which can turn into bulimia. So, if you are regularly overeating, if you feel really discomfortable after that, if you feel having this, if you have impulsive, over eating, or if you are in the extreme, when you are also self inducing vomiting after that, then you definitely need to listen to this episode for a different perspective, a holistic overview of the reasons what really causes this condition, and which are the things that you may or may not recognise in yourself that are also related to the same topic. So, of course, when we talk about food, one of the main things that we will think about are our emotions. And yes, there is a direct link between overeating and some issues around emotions. The main and more most significant situation or reason is related to some kind of impulses, which we can control. And what's very typical is that the person is actually trying to have some kind of control over certain period of time, very often this is during the day. And they are stopping themselves from eating or doing something that they want. And at certain point, it could be in the evening, or sometimes it's just a couple of times during the week, they fall into the trap of uncontrollable desires, and they become victims of their own impulses. and in this situation, one of the most important questions to ask yourself is, what are you not doing that you really want to do? What kind of neat, you're not really satisfying. Because usually, it's something big, and it's totally different than food, you may want to do something creatively, but you are not allowing yourself to take the risk. Or sometimes you want to be with a different partner. But again, you are not allowing yourself to do this, or make the change or take the risk. Or there is something else, which you are not allowing yourself to have, you have a hunger for something. But usually, it's something much different than food. So it's a great direction actually to explore. And obviously everyone will find their own answers. Because you may have a hunger for something specific. But because you are judging yourself, or you're not allowing yourself to have this. And sometimes you might even be suppressing this, then it becomes as an uncontrollable impulse for eating, because eating seems to be safer. You'd need to do it anyways. And it's for the body. We need this to live. So on the surface, it seems like it's something which we are allowed to do. It seems like there's no risk, you won't be judged. You won't hurt someone else. You want embarrass yourself if you fail, for example. So on the surface, it seems like it's allowed, it's acceptable. And of course, we know that this may turn into something very uncontrollable. And sometimes it can be even detrimental for your health. But on the surface level, it seems like it's the easier choice. So the big question here is, what is your real hunger for and what are you not doing or Not allowing yourself to have. And when you admit this, you are making a huge step. Sometimes it's true that the things that we may want may not be appropriate, that's also a valid option. And very often, that's what we feel. So instead of processing, the embarrassment that we may feel around this desire, or admitting that this is something wrong, or that we should not do something, instead, we suppress this. And this energy just cannot disappear, you know that the subconscious mind does not forget consciously, you may forget about something, you may suppress something, but your subconscious mind won't do that. And then it will surface as an uncontrollable desire for something safer, like food, for example. And, of course, we always have the reasons why one of the most typical is we are over stressed. So this helps us to relax, to calm down. Yeah, that is, that is also true. But why are you so anxious in the first place? And you may say, Well, my life is very busy, I have such and such responsibilities. And I hear you and I know that you are right for yourself. But I also know that probably there is an even deeper reason of something that you are not allowing yourself to recognize, admit embrace, and either make a conscious decision that this is not appropriate, but you're still embracing at least the desire for this. Or maybe you're taking the risk and going in this direction, and trying to fulfil your desire. So impulsiveness is one of the biggest components and desires, what is your greatest desire that is unfulfilled. And it's a lot of self work, but it can be so worth it, because you can set yourself free from this need to binge eat to, to take more than you can actually process. This is also very big, because sometimes we, we want to do big things. And we want to be able to process a lot at once. And the psyche, the mind, the body, they have their own rhythm. And sometimes binge eating may mean that we are forcing ourselves to process more than we can actually process. So it's kind of like a violence against ourselves. Of course, that is relevant for the cases when you are eating to the point that you feel physically sick after that, or you're extremely uncomfortable for at least two hours or maybe even during the whole night. Or you may even need to vomit in order to release this feeling.
So if you get to this point, that physically you feel bad, probably emotionally, you feel bad as well. It's strange, you know, because we seem to do that in order to feel better. For example, we are overstressed during the day, or we are annoyed by something or angry about something. And we want to eat in order to come down. But eventually, we overeat, we binge eat. And after that we get to the point that we feel bad, but this time, it's not for the initial reason. It's because of the overeating. So Ironically, the negative emotion is still present. It may look differently, but it's still negative emotion. So obviously that's not a solution. Obviously this is not healthy. So admitting, what is it that you are not allowing yourself to have what do you really have hunger for and processing Generally, we may say that this is pretty universal. overeating is caused by unprocessed emotions. It could be stress, it could be fear of abandonment, it could be fear of rejection. And rejection is especially valid if you get to the point that you need to induce vomiting. In this case, or if you just feel so sick that eventually it happens, but it's kind of the same, you are rejecting something or you feel rejected by by someone. And another big reason when we eat normally, the nervous system is affected. And we get more into the condition of relaxed state. Because more of the energy more of the blood goes to the stomach for digestion. So, of course, we have all had this experience having a little bit more for lunch. Even if it's not binge eating, it's just a little bit more, and then you feel sleepy during the afternoon, and you're not that productive. The reason for that is because most of the blood goes to the stomach for digestion. And it literally affects the nervous system. So this is just you know, like a scientific statement. It's not something that we are interpreting. And when we are over eating, we may subconsciously try to symbolically sedate ourselves. So ask yourself, why would you want to sedate yourself? Is there something that you want to stop yourself from feeling? Is there something that you want to stop yourself from doing? And what are you getting out of this, because binge eating is kind of a way for us to sedate ourselves. So you need to explore why that might be true for you. Another also very important direction is a feeling of emptiness. When we feel empty inside because of depression, apathy, sadness. Sometimes this may even be like boredom. And all of that can bring the feeling of emptiness and food is one way for us to fulfil this. And to avoid the emptiness. But of course, all of that is on an emotional level. And food can never be enough food cancer day to food can make you sleepy. But this is not really fulfilling your deep or need. This is not handling with your sense of emptiness. So very often there could be something in the past that has made us feel alone or on our own an empty. And of course, it's all emotional again. Also, significant direction here is the feeling of never having enough. And what does enough mean to you? Generally, not just about food, actually, I'm talking about all the other stuff in your life. Do you feel like it's just never enough? What you are doing what you are receiving what you are giving anything in your life, you may have the feeling like it's never enough. And when something is not enough, we feel the need to take more and more. But when you have this as an initial problem, that whatever you do, or whatever you have, it never seemed To be enough, even with the food, you will still keep doing it and feel the same way, eating and eating, and it never feels enough, and it never feels enough until eventually, physically you feel bad. So what is it that you don't have enough of in your life, this is also a big direction to explore. And I want to present you also one more reason, which is related to the family history. Or it could also be, of course, the person's individual history. And it's about poverty or lack. One option, if in your childhood, you have been raised in poverty, or your parents have constantly reminded you're sad that we don't have enough or we won't have enough to eat tomorrow or next week. And if you have had this idea, or we may not have enough, we may not have enough, very often later, as grown ups, those people have some issues around food. And very often it could be bench eating, very often also, they can't throw away food. So for example, if there is too much food in the fridge, and it's about to become bad, they will eat all of it, but they want to throw it away. Because subconsciously, it's just unacceptable for them. Because of the poverty in the past, their mind has the idea that when you have something available, you have to take as much as you can, because tomorrow you may not have. So any history of lack poverty, scarcity, may also bring eating disorders, and especially binge eating, in extreme cases, also bulimia. And it's also possible that it may not be your own story, it could be the story of your family members, especially the generations that have been to wars. During those times, many, many, many people have lived in poverty and fear about how they will make it tomorrow. Sometimes people have died out of starvation, of course, and all of that has created a huge fear. And this fear is also processed and kind of like moved from one generation to another. So this is also a big one, explore if you have any family members that have been through poverty, lack, scarcity, starvation, all of that.
And very often, we may find that there is a combination of factors. For example, in the family history, there has been poverty, we may also have the memory that it's never enough. It's never ever enough. So we have to take more and more. And for example, we may have unrecognised or unadmitted impulse and desire that we are suppressing. And then it shows up as uncontrollable desire for food. So a big topic. And again, it's possible that things may not be so bad with you. Maybe you don't have like, extreme conditions, and it's just not enough for you know, some kind of diagnosis. So technically, doctors may not consider you as really sick. But if you feel some kind of discomfort around food around your eating habits, if you are systematically overeating, then you still need to look at those same reasons and Yeah, it's a big one. And you can definitely improve things by recognising all of those possible patterns, and the working with them. And that's an individual work. That's not something that another person can do on your behalf, you have to participate in that. But it can be extremely rewarding. Because it's about your health and your emotional well being. And I believe that those are the most important things actually in our life. So make a decision. Also. analyse your own patterns. What are you doing? When are you doing it? And then go through those possible causes. Again, I will summarise them for you. impulses, anything that has to do with desires on the recognised unadmitted desires.
What are you not allowing yourself to have or do? Also? What could be the reason to sedate yourself? Is there something you don't want to think about? You don't want to feel you want to avoid?
Also anything that has to do with rejection that you feel rejected? Or are you rejecting something or someone abandoned month? Do you have a fear of abandonment, emptiness? Do you feel empty? Any unprocessed emotion what is it that you cannot digest symbolically and also any stories of lack and poverty both in your own past and in your family history? Those are the big reasons for having issues around bitch bench eating or bulimia or over eating, stress eating whatever you want to call it. And I hope that it was helpful for you. I hope that you will find some answers and even more importantly you will look at things and process them and eventually live a healthier and happier life. Thank you for joining me and I will catch you next time.